Odumeje v. Frizzy., 565 N.G. 605, 740 L.Ed.Call 911 (Chwenty Chwenty).

There many ways that you want me to start this reply. But I won't! I will not fall for your temptation. You want me to tell you who I am. You want me to say you are not important. But I won't. I won't! Am not a normal person. I don't do what you expect, am war! Am Indaboski! Bahose! Am the lion himself.
Who you? Where you form? Uliversity student, who form you?
You are an app that has refused to close and am the control panel, am war!!!
You are a Genin, challenging Uchiha Madala. Me!

There is nothing like modern religion. Religion is religion and this is our way of life. You think you can use big English? Am war! Big English don't work for me. My Corona villus prediction did not fail. I said Corona villus will end first week of April, but if not for the businessmen. We have businessmen in this country. Our politicians are businessmen. It is because of them that my vision did not come to pass. Their businesses have tampered with my business with the holy spirit. And the holy spirit will deal with them baaad. Very bad! I have said I! I don't use drugs, am not a normal person. How dare you call my faith in God a delusion? How dare you? Who you? My church is always full. People pray from outside the church when church is full, they can feel the touch of the holy spirit. My energy usually pass from me through the television and phone screen to people that watch me. My church service is transgressive, it is transcendent! transforming! You can feel my energy! my power! My fire! Bahose! That is why. Nobody can ignore me, it is my time and I have come. We hold week services every Tuesdays and Thursdays. We are currently closed because of the Corona villus. We don't fear the villus, but the government, the business men, I just pity them.

How do you decide a real pastor in Nigeria? You judge only because of what you can see. You don't see the spirit world. You think a scorpion is prettier than a spider because of its lovely tail? You are wrong!
Because your pastors have private jets? Am not a man of worldly things. Even though I may buy a jet in the future if I can afford it, every man must not be entering private jet. A man of God does not need jet.
I have sold leather, I have played football, nothing worked. I did not succeed, because God wanted me to get to this stage. He planned everything from the beginning. Now I travel out, dance and spray money with music artists and celebrities. God has a plan, and am Bahose!
Real pastors talk about the love of God? No, I don't talk about love, I am not a normal person, everyone can never be preaching love. Am not a man of preach of love, am a war, am a fight, am Indaboski, see my hand strike down enemies. Bahoseeeeee. I can turn your life to bet Naija ticket, it will cut, no matter what.

You can not satisfy Nigerians. you have to die to satisfy Nigerians. Only Yar'adua satisfied Nigerians. Am not Yar'adua, am Indaboski! I don't want to satisfy Nigerians. Keep your temple of justice, keep your public opinion, nobody can judge or execute me. God has selected me!
All of you that want me to die. It is impossible. I can't die! It is impossible to have the annointing and then die like a chicken! Am war!
I will never die. If I die, it will be because everybody else has died.

People in my church are here because they have met God. They encountered God through me. And that is why they believe me. They are not stupid. You don't have to believe me. You are going to hell. You will burn! Am fire!!
You are the ignorant one. He who believes in God does not ask stupid questions. That is blasphemy.


Don't compare the Land of Freedom to Guyana. Am Indaboski, personally chosen by God to rescue Nigeria. When the end time comes, only the people in my church will go to heaven. In a chariot of fire. I will not save you a space in heaven, not even the half a plot in front of my receded hairline. You will regret this.
You will be clying, you will cly, when you cly, I won't rescue you. This is your chance to come to the light. Because when you get what you get, you don't get upset. You will not experience the third coming, the orgasm after the second coming of Jesus. You will not experience it.

You have chosen the wrong fight, when King Herod! King Herod! King Herod threatened to kill Jesus Chlist, God told Mary and Joseph to carry baby Jesus and run, a whole God. The most high, the am that am. And yet you, you want to fight me. The Herod of your life!
You think you have said it with your chest? Nonsense, you are confused, you say you are not an atheist but you write like someone that does not believe in God. You don't know which part you are. You will burn! You have not talked with your chest, you have simply grumbled with the flesh hanging on your ribs.

Ayam am war.
Ayam fight.
Ayam battle.
Ayam the Abido shika.
Ayam the lebadu sepre and the lemande.
Ayam the liquid metal.
Ayam Indaboski.
The Lion.
I smile, my smile is Dangelous.
I joke, my joke is Dangelous.
I am a coat of many koros.
People will talk, they will say many things about me, but unlike you, they will never say I did not sayeet with my chest!

Yours in Fire and Brimstones, Pastor Chukwuemeka.
Picture Credit: Ryu Daango.